Warcraft III

Frozen Throne!
Yeahh... aku taktau kenapa aku sudah ketagih dengan game ni. Gian tul tak dapat main. Semuanya gara-gara rakan sepejabat yang sibuk berperang di sini. Aku yang menjadi satu-satunya spesis perempuan di ofis ni pun dah kemaruk. Dapat pulak kawan aku ni menggalakkan aku main sekali. Okla aku join je tapi aku duduk belakang nampak musuh aku lari dulu panggil askar hahaha.. itu je la keroje aku.

Aku ambil langkah drastik dengan menginstall game ni di rumah. Tapi malang sekali, pc aku mati setiap kali aku cuba nak main game ni. Padahal bila aku main kat ofis ok je? Nampaknya kat ofis ajelah aku lepaskan gian aku fire askar2 Scourge ni.

Kami sanggup makan tengahari lambat utk battle. Dan ada antara rakan ofis yang sanggup pulang lewat untuk menyertai misi hehehe.. parah.. parah. Hari ni aku kena balik awal, mak aku nak datang. Hmm.. masak je lah apa yg patut. Nasib baik game ni tak boleh dimainkan kat pc kat rumah tu, kalau tak tentu aku mengalami sindrom ketagih malam kang..

Mind My English 4 - PS

Ok.. I had posted a script for our Public Speaking presentation. I can't remember whether I had written it here that we didn't manage to put up the play. Oh yeah.. I wrote that already. Actually, I had Plan B, if in case we couldn't do the play. The Plan B was that I would do the presentation alone. Well, I'm prefer to stand up alone on the stage rather than singing in a group. I'd been in that situation and I really felt stupid haha..

So here it goes, a poem that I wrote about Public Speaking. As usual, you are free to recite the poem but don't forget to give me the credits :D

By the way, I forgot to tell you that finally, we did 2 in 1 presentation. Poem recital in acting, I might say. There were three of us. One of us really couldn't practise a thing, so she acted as a successful executive with zero ability in public speaking. Another guy wrote his own poem so he recited his. His poem was about our experience in Public Speaking class which the objective was to persuade the executive to join Public Speaking class in order to resolve her problem. Then, lastly it was my turn to recite my own poem to explain to the executive what Public Speaking is all about. Finally, we did a prank where the girl call the English For Public Courses Coordinator and she put on the speaker haha.. everybody laughed at the Coordinator as she sounded so confused. And for that hardwork (I don't know anybody else but I found myself really worked hard on this presentation), we got 4th place out of 8 presentations. I was satisfied eventhough we didn't get the best 3 places but at least we got our own souvenir not like other group, they had to share (and how would they do that?).

Anyway, just enjoy reading the poem below...

PS

Public Speaking
Is an art of an act

Unleash your talent
And don’t be scared

Be organized
Without beating around the bush

Let the world understand
What you’re trying to introduce

Impromptu, persuasive,
Informative and all speeches

Confidence and calmness
Will defeat your nervousness

Sell your idea
And share your knowledge

Practice your speeches…
Hey…It can be a hedge

Express your greatness
In your best appearance

Articulation and pronunciation
Making them right for the language perfection

Keep the pace…
And pause when you need

Involve your audience
And you’ll make them grin

Never tell lies
Always be honest

Gesture and facial expression
Must be right at the moment

PS for workers, PS for employers
PS for all and the entire world
PS for PEACE …and humanities…

Rin, PJ, December 14, 2006

Melayu

Pengurus kami menghantar e-mail yang mengandungi puisi berikut.

Di mana boleh cari ramai Melayu
Pastinya di Kelantan dan Terengganu
Dan juga di pasar malam dan pasar minggu
Di Akademi Fantasia dan Pesta Lagu
Di Jom Heboh orang Melayu berpusu-pusu
Di Sungai Buloh, pusat pemulihan, dulu di Pudu
Dan di jalan, lumba haram, rempit tak berlampu
Dan di selekoh duit rasuah depa pun sapu
Di pusat serenti akibat ketagih dadah dan candu
Di malam kemerdekaan dan malam tahun baru
Terkinja-kinja best giler menari macam hantu


Apa hobi orang Melayu
Terkenal dengan budaya malas dan lesu
Berlepak buang masa tak jemu-jemu
Atau baca majalah Mastika, Metro pasal cerita hantu
Tengok telenovela dari Filipina dan Peru
Berpusu-pusu pergi tengok pamiran hantu
Sambil makan junk food, kuaci dan muruku
Sibuk bercerita tentang Datuk K dapat bini baru
Apa pakaian Siti nak pakai itu yang nak tahu
Mana tak gendut berpenyakit selalu
Kalau nak berlagak melayu masih nombor satu
Asal bergaya sanggup makan nasi dan tofu


Boleh tak jumpa mereka di kedai buku
Atau di perpustakaan dan majlis ilmu
Atau ambil kelas kemahiran di hujung minggu
Ada tapi kurang sangat mereka di situ
Kenapa melayu jadi begitu
Nak salahkan siapa ibubapa atau guru
Pemimpin negara atau raja dulu-dulu
Ayat lazim di mulut ialah Melayu malas selalu
Nak harap Kerajaan saja membantu
Terutama sekali kontraktor kelas satu
Tak habis-habis gaduh nak jatuh siapa dulu
Pasal jambatan senggek [sic] atau siapa dia penghulu
Dan suka sanggat dengan budaya ampu mengampu


Sampai bila kita nak tunggu
Bangsa Melayu jadi bangsa yang maju
BO leh! dengan beberapa syarat tertentu
Pertama dengan banyak menguasai ilmu
Kata nabi ikutlah Quran dan sunnah ku
AlQuran yang diturunkan 1400 tahun dahulu
Tapi apa yang kita tahu, cuma baca bila nak halau hantu


-author unknown-

Anak dara

Tolongg.. yana pagi tadi aku tgh mandi dia dah ketuk2 pintu bilik air ckp "ibu.. nak pakai.. nak pakai".. aku malas bukak dah lambat. Skali aku kuar je tengok2 moncong dia dah merah ngan lipstik (kale berry gelap tu).. avon punye yg sample kecik. waargghh.. aku marah la jugak.. aku amik terus dari tangan dia sebab takut kena sarung kusyen ke.. tapi elok2 plak dia tonyoh kat mulut je sememeh skit2 je.

Dah banyak kali dia hijack lipstik aku.. takut bibir dia jadi kering je nanti. Pagi tadi gak dia conteng dinding bilik ngan pen .. aku tekejot terus aku sergah marah dia.. dia tekejot terus majuk.. (spontan le aku sergah dia aku pun takleh kontrol)..
Sampai nursery macik nursery terus cakap.. anak dara dah anak awakkk..
aritu kat kampung dia kejekan Lip Ice adik aku (ada kale sket2).. sampai takleh pakai dah. Mak aku ckp... "cepatla ko dpt menantuuu.. tua la kooo.. ahahahaha.."

Tensen .. cis.. !

Mind My English 3 - Duped

This is the script that I wrote for our presentation at the IIUM English For Public Courses Certificate Giving Ceremony, December 2006. Unfortunately, this play couldn't be performed as we were lacked of casts and time to practise.

Enjoy reading it and use your imagination to spice it up. If any of you want to put up a play using this script, you may do it but don't forget to give me the credits, yeah. It's more to Malaysian joke though.


Characters : Mal, Fui Fui, Ajlaa, Rin

An English teacher will be doing a vocabulary quiz for his students. He mentions a word and the students will write down the meaning or the descriptions.

Mr Coklat : Good evening class. Before we start our class today, I would like you to do me a favor. Put up your hands if you don’t bring any dictionary.

(Some students will check their bags. Some will talk to each other. All of them raise their hands, slowly and a little bit unsure.)

Ajlaa : I put up my hand because I don’t bring any dictionary and I want to ask you a question.

Mr Coklat : Yes, please, Ajlaa.

Ajlaa : Why do you ask us to put up our hands if we don’t bring our dictionaries?

Mr Coklat : Well, should I ask you to put up your stinky feet? I just want to make sure you don’t bring any because I want to do a pop quiz for you. Since all of you love to leave your dictionaries at home, I will make sure you will miss it so much after this. This quiz will be included in 10% of your final grade. (muahahaahahaha…laughing devilishly)

Fui Fui : But you didn’t ask us to bring dictionary, maaaaa (agreed by others)

Mr Coklat : Hello… I am not your mother!?

Fui Fui : Soo..soo..sorry, but you did not ask us to bring dictionary, Mr Coklat.

Mr Coklat : Enough! Let us not waste our time. I will tell you several words and on a piece of paper I want you to write down the word and the meaning for me.

Rin : Fui Fui, can I borrow your paper? I forgot to bring one, lah.

Fui Fui : Haiyaa.. Rin..we are busy here and you want to read newspaper ahh??

Rin : Noooo..laaahh.. paper.. paper.. I want to write my answer..

Fui Fui : OOOoooohh… haiyaa..take this..take this.. (give a piece of red paper to Rin). What color is your paper?

Rin : Of course lah white one..i left it at home.

Fui Fui : You said you want to borrow, right? Never mind, lah.. no need to give me back..I just want red paper.

Rin : hi hi hi.. oohh you want the “Ong” ahh.. hi hi.. thank you..thank you..

Mr Coklat : All right, class! The first word is … “Supernatural”!

Rin : Oooohh.. that’s an easy one. I know what “Super Natural” is! (Writing something on the paper)
Mr Coklat : Second word is … “Born”.

Ajlaa : Rin.. can we change the answer? I don’t know the first word.

Rin : Of course we can change the answer. If you think the answer is wrong, then change it lahhhh…

Ajlaa : No laaaa.. I want your answer for the first word.. and I will give you my answer for the second one.

Fui Fui : Ooohh.. she wants to exchange the answer, maaaa..

Rin : Why don’t you tell me.. ish ish ish..

Mr Coklat : Silence!!!!! You are talking too much. This is the third word and I don’t want to hear you making noise anymore. The third word is “Corner”.
I give you 10 seconds, and when I call your name, tell me what is the meaning of the word. (Keep on knocking the table using the rattan stick).

1…2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…10

Azrina! Tell me what does “Supernatural” mean? What it is?

Rin : You must be kidding me, Mr Coklat .. (giggling). You have asked me the easiest question I have ever heard. “Super Natural” is the youngest brother of Superman and he is the friend of Ultraman Nexus. His girlfriend is…

Mr Coklat : Stop it! What are you talking about? Do the squats now.. 3 times!

Rin : Cannot.. please..please.. I miss my dictionary already.

Fui Fui : No.. pity her, maaaaa…

Mr Coklat : Fui Fui.. you will also have the same fate as hers if you can not answer my question! (Talking fiercely and annoyingly.. keep on knocking the table with the rattan stick). What do you understand from the word “Born”?

Fui Fui : Bond…. (pause). James Bond.

Mr Coklat : You….!!!!!!!!! Do you want me to shoot you now? Grrr…grrr…

Fui Fui : (Speaking in Chinese.. asking for help)

Rin & Ajlaa : Noooooo…

Mr Coklat : Ok.. Calm down, Coklat.. calm down. Ajlaa, you will save them all if you can answer my last question. Otherwise, all of you will face the greatest sentence on earth.. (muahahahaha… )
Now, explain to me about the word “Corner”.

Ajlaa : Very the easy one, Sir. (Acting as she is riding a motorbike … brrr..brrr.. and suddenly make a big turn). Right now, I’m making a big “kona”, Sir!

Rin : Good one, Ajlaa.

Mr Coklat : Arrgghhhh..!! (Screaming).. This is why you should bring your dictionary when you go to English course!

Mr Coklat chases Rin, Ajlaa and Fui Fui.

Fui Fui : Hey, why should we afraid of you? If you are good, then what are the meanings of the words?

Mr Coklat : I don’t need to answer that, I’m good.

Rin : No.. we want the proof! Yeaaa.. don’t look at the dictionary! (Speaking out loud)

Ajlaa : Let me hold this for you (take away the rattan stick and knock the table with it).

(Ajlaa, Rin and Fui Fui look angry and as they want to beat Mr Coklat… Mr Coklat ducks)

Mr Coklat : Please.. please.. forgive me.. I’m not the real Mr Coklat, I don’t even know how to teach English. I’m your classmate!.. (Crying)

Ajlaa, Rin, Fui Fui : WHAT!!!!!!?????? Give us back our money! Yea..yea..

Fui Fui : We have been cheated. So what are we going to now, aahh??

Rin : Hey.. I heard IIUM have English for Public Courses. How about we go there and register for the course? It is quite cheap, you know.

Ajlaa : Yea.. Let’s not waste our time. Let’s go!

Mr Coklat : Wait! Take me with you! I want to get registered too..

Ajlaa : Hey.. Mr Coklat the liar.. (looking at the time) it’s already 10pm. We want to go home lah!


THE END…

Script by : Azrina Hussin, PJ